


Ripples 16

by Grey (grey853)



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M, Multiple Partners, Series: Ripples
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 01:40:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/792552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grey853/pseuds/Grey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim tries to be more open and share his feelings.<br/>This story is a sequel to Ripples 15.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ripples 16

## Ripples 16

by Grey

Author's webpage: <http://grey.ravenshadow.net/>

* * *

Disclaimer: Not mine, yet. 

Summary: Jim works on trying to be more open about his feelings. 

Notes: Thanks to Jenn aka XFreak for the edits and the continuing support. 

Warning: If you don't like the idea of Jim and Blair being involved with Simon, read another story. 

* * *

Ripples 16  
by Grey 

"I'm not sure about this, Chief." 

"Come on, man. Just close your eyes and relax. Trust me." 

"I do trust you, but I feel stupid." 

A naked Simon shook his head as he sat cross-legged at the end of the bed. "Give it a chance, Jim. A little massage, a little talk. Might do us all good." 

"I don't see what was so wrong with what we were doing." 

Blair touched his bare chest, his palm open. "Nothing's wrong with the sex, Jim. You're great. So's Simon. It's just like I said before, it's got to be more than sex." 

"Does it have to be tonight? I'm tired." 

"All the more reason to lie back and let us take care of you." 

His eyes closed, Jim sighed and gave in. "Touch away, Chief. Do what you have to." 

"You make it sound like it's a punishment." 

"I'm not sure what you're going to do." 

"Simon and I are going to touch you. Nothing major, some massage to make you feel better, more relaxed." 

"You did that last night, Chief. So, why does this feel different?" 

"You tell me." 

His eyes still closed, Jim frowned, not really sure what to say, but finally speaking quietly. "I guess I just like to do it without thinking about it first." 

"It?" 

"You know what I'm saying. This is more like a ritual. That's your thing, not mine." 

The mattress dipped as Simon moved in by his side, his voice deep and husky. "Nothing wrong with a little ritual and dance every now and again, Jim." His large hand petted back his hair, cradling his skull, while his other hand gently stroked the side of his face. The touches continued up and down his jawline, setting up an easy rhythm. 

Meanwhile, Blair used both hands like a synchronized team, slowly kneading down the middle of his chest, his fingers teasing his nipples. Languid heat layered his skin, his cock waking up and begging for attention, but receiving none. Ever so gradually, Blair worked his way to his belly and then over his hips, ignoring his groin completely. Carefully, he teamed his hands to manipulate and rub his thighs, down his shins, to his feet, and back up again. 

The whole time the ache of arousal grew as his lovers touched and soothed him, caressing his body with their talented hands. Simon lowered his mouth to Jim's and captured his breath, his tongue pushing in, the strength overwhelming. Jim arched up, his moans swallowed as Blair joined in by finally paying attention to his weeping erection. 

His fingers tangled in Blair's curls as the younger man fondled his balls, rolling them before he licked the tip, teasing and sucking around the crown of his cock. Thighs spread and Blair kneeled between his legs, his head bobbing to keep up with Jim's pumping hips. Simon refused to surrender control and kissed him long and hard, stopping for air and then dived back in, sucking away at his throat, his mouth devouring his exposed skin and down his chest. 

Blair's hands lifted his thighs upward suddenly. Using one hand to pump him, his lover used his fingers and his tongue to attack his ass, his whiskers like kindling wood to spark flame. 

Heat gained weight, the storm of coming gathering at the outer reaches of his body. The roar in his head rumbled as his senses staggered, nothing working but pleasure, all the right sensations plugged in as Simon bit his shoulder and Blair thrust his tongue inside him. The world rocked and ground him to pieces, the spasm catching him mid-groan as he tumbled into layers of flashing color, the reds whirling into greens and golds so vast he couldn't see the edges. 

Simon's salty smell, the heavy taste of cigars, the springy coil of Blair's curls against his belly, all returned to him in leisurely stages. His guide's worried voice urged him to answer. "Come on, man. You still there?" 

"You call that touch therapy, Chief?" 

A relieved chuckle vibrated up his middle as Blair rested on his stomach. "Well, it started out that way." 

"I like how it ended better." 

"I'll bet. Guess I need more practice at not having sex." 

"Not if you ask me." 

Simon reached an arm over and pulled him closer, resting his free hand against his chest. "I'd give anything to have a picture of your face when you came. You're really beautiful." He kissed his nipple and sighed. "We love you, Jim. You don't have to be an asshole to get us to prove it." 

Stiffening, Jim tried to sit up only to have Blair push him back down while Simon held him all that much more tightly. Checking out their determined faces, he swallowed hard and relaxed back against the sheets. "I don't set out to be an asshole." 

"I know, man." Blair sat up and straddled Jim's hips, his ass sitting right over Jim's spent cock. "I just want you to know we understand. It's got to be hard. Everyone you've ever been with has betrayed you. We're not going to do that." 

"I want to believe that, Chief, and in my head I do. It's just that I believed it all the other times, too." 

"And you're gun-shy, is that it?" Simon sat up beside him, his hand still easing circles over his heart. "I can understand that. After Joan I didn't date for the longest time." 

"And your problem goes deeper than that, man." 

"What are you saying?" 

"Well, you've had so much trauma. Peru must have been hard, losing your men, waking up and finding yourself in the middle of a foreign culture like that." 

"I told you before I don't remember much about it." 

"I know what you told me. I just think there's plenty more you're not telling, things you remember, but are afraid to think about. And if you really don't remember, well, there's got to be a reason for that, too." 

No longer under the calming influence of coming, Jim rolled over and worked his way free from his lovers. He sat on the edge of the bed, his back to both men. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. I need a shower." 

"Jim, Blair's just trying to help." 

"The past is over. Why keep bringing it up?" 

Blair touched his shoulder lightly, his muscles flinching at the unexpected contact. "Because I think it's part of the reason you're so scared." 

"Scared?" Jim turned and met his friend's deep blue eyes, the dark pupils still dilated from arousal. "I'm not scared, Chief." 

"Then what?" 

"I don't know." He looked away and ran his hand back over his buzzcut, the sweat still drying. "I just keep getting this overwhelming sense of dread." 

"Dread? What the hell are you talking about, Jim?" Simon's voice scraped the air, his words more concerned than angry. 

"It's going to sound stupid." 

"Tell us, man." 

"I keep thinking this is too good, that it's going to blow up in our faces or I'm going to fuck up. Every time I get to feeling too good about us being together, I just can't help but think when are they going to wise up and realize how it's all so fucking pointless?" 

"Fucking pointless? Jesus, Jim, how can you say that?" Blair edged closer and shifted to sit beside him. Wrapping an arm around his waist, he shook his head. "No wonder you keep pushing." 

Simon spoke up from behind him. "Then tell me, because I don't have a clue." 

"It's about control." 

"Control?" Jim glanced over as Blair watched him, his face serious. 

"Yeah, you figure if it's going to end anyway, like every other thing in your life, you're going to at least control when it happens." 

"How do you figure that? I swear to you, I don't plan when I get jealous or say some bonehead shit about you sucking Simon off." 

"I know you don't plan it, but you still do it. It's like a test, man. How much do they really love me? Your fear response is working overtime trying to protect you from being hurt again." 

"My fear response? That's bullshit. You make me sound like some kind of headcase." 

"He doesn't mean it like that, Jim. Just listen. I think he might be on to something. Maybe that's why you've started having nightmares." 

"He had one today, too, Simon, right before you got here." 

Standing up, Jim reached for his robe and stepped toward the stairs as he slipped it on and tied his sash. "I'm going to take a shower. All this psychobabble gives me a headache." 

"Jim, wait, man. Don't be pissed." 

"I'm not pissed. Just tired." He stopped at the top of the steps and looked back at the men he loved, both still sitting naked on the bed. "I hear what you're saying, Chief. I do. I just don't agree with it." 

"Then what's going on? Why the nightmares and crazy senses?" 

"Like I said, I'm tired. A lot's happened in the last month. You were hurt, almost died for christsakes. Add to that, we've had nothing but shit for cases lately. There's nothing to make a federal case about." 

"You sure, Jim?" Simon spoke in hush, his voice stretched over the words. 

"I'm sure. Now, why don't you two take care of yourselves while I get cleaned up?" 

Blair smiled again and tilted his head. "Why don't you help us?" 

"Like I said, I'm tired, Chief. Have fun." Waving, he headed downstairs, leaving his lovers in confusion. 

Even shutting the bathroom door and turning on the water didn't stop him hearing their conversation. He knew he shouldn't listen, should give them the privacy they deserved, but he couldn't. 

"You think he's okay?" 

"I hope so, Simon. He scares me sometimes." 

"Scares you how?" 

"Do the words self-destructive and repressed mean anything?" 

"He's not that bad. Like you said, he's got some demons, that's all. We all do. He'll be all right." 

"Yeah, maybe." 

The slightest rustle of sheets, the slide of a hand against sweaty skin, the kissing of lips married a low moan and whimper. Jim paused as he closed his eyes and imagined Simon stretching out over their partner as he got ready to love him better than he ever could. 

* * *

"Hey, Ellison. How's it hanging?" 

"Martin?" Jim looked up from his desk, startled. Mid-thirties, bleached hair, dressed out in a tank top and leather, the man looked more like a hustler than a cop for good reason. "What are you doing here? Vice finally kick your ass out?" 

"That'll be the day. They can kiss my ass if that ever happens." Martin paused for a moment and leaned forward with a suggestive smile, his arms braced on the desk. "Come to think of it, most of the guys already have." 

"You making a commercial?" 

"Don't need one. Word of mouth sells the best product." 

"You're still full of shit." 

"Still alive and well, too." Standing straighter, Martin adjusted his leather jacket and his crotch before he sat in the chair next to the desk. "Hear you're looking for a perp fits the description of a john I might know." 

"Name?" 

"Guy called Leo Burns. The victim's name is Billy." 

"Billy what?" 

"Who knows? He called himself Billy, but we've got no real ID. We're trying to match him to runaways we have on file. As for Burns, he hangs out down at Preston's on Berry." 

"What makes you think he's the perp? Brown said we didn't have a witness to the pick up." 

"He also said that you were looking for a chicken hawk who might wear a lion's ring. Burns fits the bill. Thought you and I could pick him up." Martin crossed his arms and smiled as he leaned in, his voice lower as he whispered. "Come on, Jim. It'll be like old times. Just you and me kicking some fag freak's ass." 

Meeting muddy brown eyes, Jim shook his head. "You haven't changed a bit." He kept his words steady despite the welling anger. "You want to know why I left Vice?" 

Uneasy, Martin sat back as he shrugged. "Just figured you wanted to move up. Besides, you had that blow out with Captain Ames. Nobody blamed you for leaving." 

"Ames was an asshole, but I left because of people like you." 

"People like me? What the fuck's that supposed to mean?" 

"It means when you can't tell the players from the cops, then it's time for a change. You're as bad as the people we go after. Beating Thompson should've gotten you fired. Hell, we put people in prison for what you pulled." 

"Then why didn't you turn me in?" 

"I should have." Jim paused, his heart racing as he flashed on the brutal offense, the boy down and Martin kicking him even more. "What you did was wrong, but I'm as much to blame as you are. I should've stopped you." 

"You did stop me." 

"Not soon enough." 

"You always were a fag lover. Shit, I don't get it. Why be a cop if you can't get the perverts locked up?" 

His belly knotted, his muscles almost too tense to move, Jim inched forward. "Because some of the real perverts wear a badge, you prick. Now, get the fuck out of my face." 

His face flushed with anger, Martin stood up, unsettled by the stares aimed in their direction. "I do you a fucking favor and this is how you act?" 

"Leave." 

"Fuck you." 

As he stormed off, Blair came in from the break room carrying two coffees. "Who the hell was that?" 

"Just another ghost, Chief." 

Putting the drinks on the desk, Blair sat down, his eyes narrowed. "What's wrong? Who is he?" 

"It's a long story." 

"I've got time." 

Sighing, Jim stood up and grabbed his jacket along with Blair's. "Let's head out. I need some air." 

"Where we going?" 

"To pick up a suspect." 

Moving in step with Jim, Blair remained silent until they entered the elevator and then asked, "You going to tell me?" 

"It was a long time ago. I don't want to talk about it." 

"Sounds like you need to." 

Rubbing his forehead in frustration, Jim turned away, watching the numbers light up as they traveled to the garage. "Don't start." 

"Sure, man. You don't want to talk about it, it's done." 

As the doors opened, Jim got out his keys. Inside the truck, he started the engine and then shut it off, the hurtful images in his head too strong to ignore. "Martin and I worked together in Vice." 

"You were partners?" 

"Not exactly. I didn't have a partner, not then. We went undercover in gay bars and on the streets." 

"Undercover? Are you saying you pretended to be gay to entrap people?" 

"We didn't entrap. We were working prostitution rings. We did what we had to." 

Blair pushed back his hair, his face muscles tight. "Where does this guy Martin come in?" 

"He beat a man when I was in Vice. I let him get away with it." 

"Why?" 

"Why what? Why'd he beat the boy or why'd I let him get away with it?" 

"Boy?" 

Both hands on the wheel, Jim clenched his jaw, the words difficult. "That's how I see him. He was barely of age, Blair, just out looking to get laid and not really sure what to do or what to say. As luck would have it, the poor bastard approached Martin." 

"And offered money?" 

"Yeah, so he took him out back. I thought it was just to make the bust, but he beat the shit out of him before I could stop him." 

"Shit." 

"Exactly." 

"So, why didn't you turn him in?" 

"The kid begged me not to." 

"What?" Blair shook his head, his face confused. "I don't get it." 

Taking a deep breath, Jim sat back, his arms wrapped around himself, the shudder catching him off guard. "The kid was scared, Chief, terrified someone would find out that he was gay. Hell, he didn't care that his face was bleeding and he had a broken nose and arm. All he cared about was that no one found out where he'd been. Turning Martin in would out him." 

"Man, that sucks." 

"Right after that, I made the mistake of catching one of our esteemed city leaders with his pants down and his dick inside a fifteen-year-old hustler. My captain hauled my ass good and that's how I got reassigned to Major Crimes. The deal was I let the guy walk, I get the transfer. End of story." 

"Jesus, Jim. No wonder you're bummed out. How can those guys call themselves cops?" 

"Not everybody's like they are here, Chief, but to be honest, it's been my experience, there are more cops like Ames and Martin than Simon and the rest of the people here." 

Blair's voice softened, his hand on Jim's arm. "Then I guess it's a good thing you ended up here, huh?" 

Smiling weakly, Jim met his lover's kind eyes. "A damn good thing." 

The end 


End file.
